A slow-burn daoist dream course?

further updates/ramblings

…here on the hallow’s eve, with the rain and grey surrounding, ghosts shambling through the world’s heart — i toss a few coins to the mercy of the age, perhaps they’ll keep the ghouls at bay…

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i lost the artist name

It shouldn’t be a surprise that the last few years of my life have been a real downer. The realization that many, many people who seem to check all the boxes, in fact, have such wildly different ideologies and behavioral styles than my own that i have had to retreat, and keep retreating. I’m continually having to mange the ghosts of my illness, my ancestry, and our shared human violence… I have had to hemorrhage everything I thought I was building. I have found out the hard way that I cannot conform to the ableist demands of a population/audience/community that is constantly on the brink of hysteria and righteous zealotry. The capitalist urge to consume “the other” by abandoning dignity and reflection.

Yet there is still… something, that urges me on towards generosity and education during my declining agency here. (yes, i will be okay when i die and we can all finally cut all energetic and emotional ties.) Ming’s teachings, for one, are like a small island in a vast sea of trouble.

My own art practice has in large part turned to ash in my mouth. My aspirations for the future have also in many ways shown themselves to be mirages in a burning desert. I find myself consistently at odds with other people’s communication & coping strategies. I find myself re-wondering what this incarnate realm is really for, and why do spirits converge in such ways as to repeat and reiterate traumatic and addictive tendencies ad nauseum, building echo chambers and casting stones…

These are impulses and momentums that are beyond my frailty to cure.

But this is not the talk of some suicidally depressed and possessed narcissist. When I consider these past 45 years I do see a person who has ‘beaten’ the odds, or at least DELAYED them, and learned something valuable in the process. I have encountered my own colonized dualistic perception, my inherited emotional delusions, and been given the gift of some anti-climactic clarity.

But I have no real idea on how to keep surviving capitalism, or where to focus my burned out energy.

We are in an age of decline, collapse and precarity — unevenly distributed but nonetheless all-pervasive.

I am not the hopium coach for executive Type A “winners”, but I am also not the soothing therapist for trauma-identified “empaths” either.

What can I do that would be of service? This is the bitter gristle I continue to chew.

Here is what I have thought of recently.

The main teaching that I feel has the most benefit from Ming is his complete cycle of dream teachings. He taught this over the course of a year, and it is massive. Much of my Deathpractice course was generated while going through this course (many years ago at this point), erupting from the contact between my life and the course material. I do think that for those who are ready, Ming’s recordings are the juice. However, there is also benefit to being introduced to the material over time in a loose collective container. My friends Erin Langley and Clarissa Gunawan have done three year-long cohorts of this, with power points slides and such, and I believe others in Da Yuan Circle are going to also keep doing year-long cohorts.

I however, both cannot afford to be in these containers, and i am also not interested in being in a passive position, nor am I interested in creating slides and graphics. I am also not trying to usurp others monetary campaigns, nor am i trying to replace Ming’s teachings.

So what I think I’m going to do is host a limited series teaching based on the dream series for a while, and ask for donations on top of the monthly premium subscriptions. The lectures will be recorded and available for premium subscribers, but as this is hard work and I am seriously under-charging for my work, I would ask that you share, donate and otherwise help support it. I will be going through Ming’s written material and supplementing with my own thoughts based on my own experiences. People are free to buy Ming’s recordings from da yuan, or collaborate with me on that so that I can continue building the archive and making is more cost effective. If enough people do this, Ming’s feng shui catalogue can be accessed.

I may announce some times after the Nov 6th Night Gardener’s meeting, after contemplating some more on this. Link to that is in the premium subscribers tab labeled Database of The Dao.

Let me know your thoughts.

Do you have a nondual dream practice already?

Do you want a tighter container, are you just here window shopping, would you like to focus on a longer-term skillset?

What should I do about pricing and monetary issues?